Second: A Gay Hockey Romance (LA Storm Book 2) by RJ Scott & V.L. Locey

Author:RJ Scott & V.L. Locey [Scott, RJ & Locey, V.L.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Love Lane Books Ltd
Published: 2024-02-15T18:30:00+00:00

Chapter 13

Michael

“I can’t,” I said, with great regret. “You know that I can’t.”

“I know,” he murmured.

I appreciated his understanding, but I knew I had to tread with caution. The path to recovery was fragile, and while being with Bryce was everything I wanted in this moment, I couldn’t risk veering off course. There was an undeniable attraction, his calm demeanor, like this soft light that grounded me, and his gentle tone had been casual, but inviting.

I didn’t want casual. This wasn’t only sex, and I was aware of where it might lead. The possibility of more intimacy with Bryce was tempting, but I was just beginning to find some balance.

“Bryce, I… it’s not that I don't want to,” I started, trying to articulate the storm inside me. “I’ve been to seven Gamblers Anonymous meetings, and I’m not sure my higher power is God or anything, but I know I have to change, and it has to come from within me, and being with you might…” I swallowed hard. “You might become my new addiction,” I confessed, watching him.

He took a moment, then nodded with gravity. “I get that. How has GA been for you?”

“It’s… different,” I said, searching for the right words. “I’m not sure if I buy into everything they say, but it’s making me think. About choices. About responsibility. I mean, it’s definitely a shift,” I continued, feeling the weight of my own words. “I listen to these stories, see these people who’ve lost so much, and it’s like holding up a mirror.”

“It’s hard,” Bryce agreed.

“It’s like…” I deflated and slumped to the chair near the door. I should go, but I’d had all this realization and epiphany shit, and I wanted him to know at least some of my thought process, so it all tumbled out of me. “I have this self-destructive streak, right?” I stopped and thought about how to put it in language that made sense to me. “See, I'm like the goalie who leaves the net open.”

“I thought you played on the wing?” Bryce said, confused. “Not that I know too much about hockey.”

“It’s an analogy. Go with it.” He nodded, still confused. “So, if I was a goalie, then I'd have one job in the team, right? Guarding the goal, would be my life.” Nope, I wasn’t sure I was making sense, but I carried on anyway. “But there I go, chasing after the puck in the corners of high stakes and fast living, leaving my post unattended. Every time I gamble to throw myself into the next adrenaline rush, it’s like I'm letting in goal after goal, betraying the team I’m supposed to be a part of. I’m playing every position except my own, and my life, my team, pays the price.” My shoulders ached with tension, and I tried to relax as Bryce’s expression softened.

“I understand,” he murmured, and I knew he did, even with my half-assed hockey analogies.

“Starting a relationship now just doesn’t seem right. I’m skating on thin ice, struggling to stay upright in my own life.

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